4 ways your sex life gets better in later life

Emma L
3 min readJun 2, 2023

There’s a perception that young people are more sexually active and having better sex lives than at any other point in their lives.

But as you get older, you realise this is all quite over-rated because sex can bring a whole new way of life as you get older.

If you’ve come into your 40s wanting more pleasure, more fun and just new experiences from your sex life, you’re definitely not alone!

Here are some reasons sex can be really great later in life:

Being comfortable with your body

Many people become more confident in their body with age — great sex is about more than having the perfect body. Attractive yes, but perfect, no — because nobody is. As you approach your 40s and 50s, life teaches you to be comfortable with yourself and you stop worrying what you think you should look like. No shyness, not worrying about having the perfect bum and being comfortable with putting yourself out there can be very alluring.

Asking for what you want without fear of judgement

Want to try new things all of a sudden? Like the idea of being tied up?

Communication is key — you should be able to bring this up with your partner. If you’re single, you can be open to new experiences as you meet someone new. You might want to try something in the bedroom, but are too shy to speak up.

You stop caring what other people think of you. You aren’t afraid to speak up.

This is one of the greatest assets of getting older.

Suddenly, you can express the innermost thoughts you have. And, with a partner who genuinely loves you, you should be able to open up a conversation about it without being judged. It’s about finding new ways of doing things that work for both of you. Want to be covered in ice? You should be able to bring it up comfortably with your partner.

Judgment from your partner or anyone else is unacceptable and you just don’t tolerate it like you might once have done.

Be open to new experiences

It was always the missionary position and that’s how it always starts.

But, as you get older, the missionary position can become old very, very quickly.

With a long-term partner, you’re going to be having sex with that person for some time and there has to be some form of variety. Different ways of expressing yourself, your love and experiencing more pleasure.

In my 20s, I was open to trying new activities and experiences. But, when it came to sexual experiences, there were some things that simply seemed off-limits to me because they somehow seemed wrong or too strange.

Things you didn’t like the sound of before could turn to be great.

As you get older, you open your mind up, especially if you’ve been in an unhappy relationship. Wanting to express your love for and with your partner changes and what might have seemed out of range before, is suddenly opened up to new options.

No pressure of having kids

When you’re younger, sex is very much linked to having children. With most people, the feeling is there to procreate and sex can slip into a limited zone of becoming too functional — that is, to serve the purpose of having a baby. As time goes on and with a ticking body clock, there can be pressure to have sex. It stops being fun or meaningful.

In later life, many people have either had children and don’t want anymore; or they do not want children at all. Sex happens for other reasons and, without the pressure of having children, it becomes a lot more deeper and meaningful. Win-win.



Emma L

Content writer and editor | Sustainability| Career & Workplace | Education | Career coach | www.emmawrites.co.uk